Pizza Blonde

She came, she ate, she conquered.

Lawry’s Garlic Salt, A Love Letter


Dear Lawry’s Garlic Salt,

I love you. You’ve got everything I need to make bad pizza taste good – salt, garlic, and paprika. You are the seasoning that makes cheesy bread taste extra cheesy. You pair well with red pepper flakes and above all else, parmesan cheese. You can go all over pizza, or just on the crust, but either way, you just make things better. You are a hero when it comes to making frozen pizza taste like real pizza. You’re the key to making garlic bread garlicky. You allow people who don’t know how to cook to make food that’s edible. Besides pizza, garlic bread, and cheesy bread, you even light up the lives of people eating steaks, burgers, chicken, and all sorts of meat. You help make vegetables not taste like garbage. I don’t think that there’s any food that you don’t taste good on – you are the little black dress of seasonings. Thank you for being you. To close, I’ll just quote an inspired Amazon review: “LAWRYS? MORE LIKE GOOD LAWDYS! THIS THE SPICE OF LIFE. GREAT ON EVERYTHING. THE HOLY SPIRIT OF SPICES, SPRINKLE SOME ON YOUR DISHES AND BAM! SALVATION! AMEN.” Amen indeed.


Pizza Blonde


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